look back and start anew

start: 30/09/2008 3:18pm on my station

> im looking back from the very first time i left my home country and went
in a foreign land with nothing but courage and faith. its a long story to tell
but its a story i will never ever forget. i can even remember the exact
emotions i felt in every chapter of it. it was tough. and im still quite struggling.
but i am proud. im not a coward afterall. i did what i want. i will stay. i'll get by.

> at this moment, after everything that happened and still happening, i have
learned that certain things are lost forever and that some are really meant
for you. however, if you do nothing and just wait for it, it will never be yours.
that's why sometimes, even if its not for you, as long as you're determined
you'll definitely have it.

> when i was going back from 10days vacation, the feeling was just pretty
normal. been-there-done-that, i said. but not until the plane was about to
take-off. i realized that i will never get used to it. just the thought of being
hundred miles away from my family again is breaking my heart. but then
again, its just phase.

> i'll start anew.